Crack Down: 10 Chilling Thin Ice Warning Signs


If the signs warn of Thin Ice and Chicago‘s playing on your radio, it might just be another Shatter Day in the park – a few months shy of the fourth of July.

Ice Ice Baby

They said “ICE” twice… they must really like ice! They also like the color red; a hue not commonly associated with ice but one that’s very popular with warning sign designers so it’s got that going for it, which is ice… er, NICE. So yeah, we get the message: “Thin Ice Ice Never Safe”. So simple, even a caveman can understand it, not to mention say it in authentic caveman proto-gibberish.

Well, it seems we’re done nitpicking here and – wait, there’s more! If thin ice is NEVER safe (according to these signs), then is it safe in April when all of the ice has melted? We accept no responsibility for enabling anyone who dares to put this crackin’ conundrum to the test. (thin ice warning sign image at top via ttarasiuk and above via Aaron Smith)

Thicket of Signs

We’re not exactly sure what’s going on here in balmy Portsmouth, England, a coastal town known more for holidays in the sun than for dangerous ice accumulations. The exact location of this curious conglomeration of signage is, in fact, Southsea – a seaside resort and suburb known for its plethora of mature Elm trees. But we digress. For the ninth time (‘cuz there are NINE signs), watch out for ice and while you’re watching, keep off it! (thin ice warning sign image via Silly Little Man)

Fat Chance

Just how thin does thin ice have to be in order for it to be dangerous – or not dangerous, as the case may be? Don’t ask the photographer who captured the wintry New Jersey scene above on January 7th of 2007, they’re too busy trying to avoid treading on ice so thin it’s practically (and actually) invisible. (thin ice warning sign image via Jackie)

Thin Man

What is this, a thin ice warning sign for ambulatory light switches? This isn’t even a poor photoshop, it’s… possibly a tall bipedal elephant balancing a ball on its head. That said, elephants of any stature have no business balancing anything on their heads while attempting to traverse thin ice. Hence the sign. (thin ice warning sign image via Rev Stan)

Killing with Kindness

We asked you politely… it’s the Canadian way, after all. In the event that this advice is ignored, however, the Ontario Health Insurance Plan (OHIP) entitles residents of the province to access emergency care free of charge. Not an Ontario resident? Sorry you hoser, and keep the %&$@ off the #&%$ thin ice! (thin ice warning sign image via Michael)

Does the ice look thin or does it just look? Check out Ice Can See You: 7 Amazing Cold & Creepy Iceberg Faces!

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