Steal This Meal: 2013’s Seven Grossest Food Thefts

As 2013 draws to a close, let’s take a tasteful look at seven criminals who bit off MUCH more than they could chew. We’re gonna need a bigger calorie counter.


(image via: Alexi Ueltzen)

Think you’ve got a sweet tooth? You got nuttin’ compared to a group of thieves in Bad Hersfeld, Germany, who were just nuts for Nutella. The gang’s meticulously planned early April heist netted them a whopping 11,000 pounds – that’s five metric tons, folks – of the delicious hazelnut-chocolate spread that, perhaps surprisingly, was valued at a mere $20,710.

(image via: S Smith)

The Nutella was unlawfully liberated from a parked trailer in the west-central German town and according to local police the crime wasn’t as unique as it might seem: thieves previously stole a truckload of energy drinks from the same location. One might say this type of crime is… spreading.

Chicken Wings

(image via: Lindsey Turner)

Yo dudes, I’mma let you finish, but we’re gonna have one of the biggest Super Bowl parties of all time… OF ALL TIME! All you need is 26,000 pounds of chicken wings and a LOT of dipping sauce. Last January 12th, two warehouse workers from Nordic Cold Storage in Lawrenceville, GA loaded up an Enterprise rental truck with 10 pallets of frozen wings worth $65,000 and wondered where they were going to find the world’s biggest oven. Hot wings indeed.

(image via: Martin Criminale)

The wing rustlers’ flight from justice didn’t last too long and after a couple of weeks Gwinnett County police arrested a pair of suspects. No telling what happened to the purloined wings (“I’m *burp* innocent!”, stated one suspect) but they originally belonged to Tyson… and you do NOT want to mess with Tyson.

Body Cleanse Juice

(image via: Juhan Sonin)

How thirsty do you have to be to steal organic fruit & vegetable body cleansing juice… really, REALLY thirsty is our guess. Multiply that parched-ness by, say, 15,303 and you’ve got the makings of both a seriously desperate crime. The theft occurred in early May when with someone backed a semi-trailer up to a dock at BluePrint Cleanse juice’s Long Island City warehouse and told staffers he was there for a pickup… he didn’t say what he was picking up or if he was authorized to do so. When the real driver showed up later that day, the warehousers realized they had a problem. As for the thief who snatched 15,303 bottles of cleansing juice worth about $153,000, once he downs a few he’ll realize he’s got a problem as well.

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