Another Fin Mess
Taking passive-aggressive signage to the next level, this No Swimming sign from Wajima, Japan apparently implores toe-dipping toddlers to please think of the fishes they’ll displace. As anyone knows, a displaced fish is a displeased fish. You don’t want to be an unpleasant fish-displacer, do you? (image via Adam Kahtava)
A Reptile Dysfunction
No words needed – you’ve got our attention, South African beach authorities! This sign can be construed as either “You CAN’T swim here” or “How fast CAN you swim?” If you choose the latter, be sure to bring a landlubber buddy – you only need to swim faster than they can. (image via David Siu)
Lifegator On Duty
Sorry folks, swimming hole’s closed – ‘gator out front should’a told ya. Then again, if the pictured alligator could speak it might’ve advised the opposite. It all depends on the time of day – and whether it’s before or after lunchtime. (image via 35mmMan)
Dogfish?
Portuguese Water Dogs would like a word or two about this sign, as would any salty seadogs left over from the historic Age of Sail. On the bright side, a world with less Wet Dog Smell can only be a good thing. (image via Caroline Ingram)
Illinoisome
Does this sign really need the “No Swimming” text to get the message across? Or the red & black graphic for that matter? No, no it does not. But hey, you do you – and don’t complain if the aftermath of an ill-considered dip in the Chicago Water System leaves you looking like Toxic Waste Guy from Robocop. Think we’ll pass on the apres-swim Chicago-style pizza, thanks anyway – oh wait, that’s your skin? (image via Chad Kainz)
Sometimes the pool’s too cool for YOU: Check out Cold Comfort: Polar Bear Swims Do A Body Good!

